By Danish Ashraf Khan
In many households of our society, it is commonly seen that when a wife asks her husband for some pocket money, the husband responds by saying, “What will you do with money? You already get everything. I bring you whatever you need. Just tell me, and I’ll get it for you. I don’t have extra money to waste.”Instead of understanding her need, he starts a long lecture, but rarely does he place any money in her hands — as if it’s impossible to acknowledge that she may need personal money too.
Remember, when a man provides his wife with good clothes, good food, and financial freedom, it does not diminish his dignity — rather, it enhances his honor and status.When husbands refuse to give their wives money, these women are often forced to seek help from their parents, ask their siblings, or even borrow from friends. By Allah! It is beyond understanding how any husband can tolerate that his wife, under his care, should go asking others for money while he is alive and capable.
Let us not forget — she is a human being too. She has her own needs and desires. She may wish to buy something of her own choice, give gifts to her parents or siblings, help a friend, donate in charity, or simply keep some money for emergencies.She has left her parents, siblings, and home for you. She has entrusted her life, her future, and her dreams to you. Now that she lives under your protection and does not go out to earn, all her needs and expenses are your responsibility.We do not hesitate to spend thousands on friends’ outings, hotels, tours, and unnecessary gatherings, but when our wife asks for a small amount for herself, we start making excuses and lectures.
Therefore, it is essential to decide a fixed amount of monthly pocket money for your wife, according to your capacity. Whether it is two thousand, five thousand, or ten thousand — whatever you can afford — make it a habit to hand over that money to her each month when you receive your salary. And once you give her that money, never ask for an account of how she spent it — where, how much, or why. Absolutely not. Let her spend it however and wherever she wishes. Because the whole purpose of pocket money is to give her the freedom to manage and spend on her own terms.
Asking for detailed accounts only creates mistrust. Be generous and kind towards your wife. Do not be miserly.Our beloved Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) beautifully said (meaning of Hadith):
“If you spend one dinar in the way of Allah, one dinar to free a slave, one dinar as charity to a needy person, and one dinar on your family — the greatest reward is for the dinar spent on your family.”
May Allah grant us the ability to act upon this beautiful teaching and honor the rights of our wives (Aameen).
